the moment where it counts the most. the test.

God has been so good!!
when desire really is something you choose to do even when you dont feel like it, and choose to go beyond what you feel, i can tell you as long as you keep pursuing God, searching for Him, and never stop, you're in for something great!! when you dont feel like it at all, but still say you will continue your search for this God wanting to know Him more, you find out later on it really is a mind over matter thing! ever since God started and stirred that hunger in me for Him, i was so hyped up wanting to tell everyone my testimony, wanting and just searching for every single opportunity i could find to tell someone and everyone my story, they hype was just great! it felt so good! that you are actually close to God, especially the wonderful experience that you actually start to hear his voice is just amazing! words cannot express how happy you'd be!! and then! all you learnt, will come into practice. where suddenly, for me, the hype slowly died down, God still was working greatly! but i just didnt feel as excited as i was before. And thats the time where it REALLY COUNTS! where all you've learnt and really does come to a point where its HARD to do, where you just dont feel the excitement as great as before. but this is the part where you show yourself faithful, and show yourself worthy to be His soldier, and His servant!

" To the faithful you show Yourself faithful, to the blameless you show yourself blameless."
~Psalm 18:26

Because my hype went down, and my excitement for things also was down, i realized, this is the moment i have been preparing for. its where all i learnt when my excitement was up, comes intor practice, and where results WILL show up, even if it looks as if it wont. But, to make things worse, i didnt obey Jesus when he told me to spend more time with Him, and because of that, the results was, i felt even further from Him, and the old strongholds had a chance to get back in. but God is gracious and Merciful! Praise Him! He gave me the strength and realization, and i chose to stay faithful and realized its mind over matter! and really, when you are faithful, God shows Himself faithful! Praise the Lord!